KINCAID, CAN I USE YOUR PICTURE -
- AS A T-SHIRT DESIGN? PLS RESPOND.
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Today’s MopeWOD: get called creepy.
If you’re like me, it shouldn’t be hard. Just be your fucking self.
A few days ago I was informed that I creeped a girl out at work. Up to this point I thought we had normal conversations all the time. We told each other stories and talked about what we were doing for school. That’s normal conversation stuff, right? I guess not when I do it. Maybe it was my posture. Maybe it was my facial expression. Did I make eye contact for too long?
I can’t live this life anymore. BRB everything I do is interpreted as beta or creeping. Guess I’ll stop doing anything and just be catatonic. Will I be normal then?
Do I creep people out at Starbucks out when I drive up listening to the Bane themes from TDKR soundtrack?
What about at the CrossFit gym when I don’t know whether to make eye contact with people as I walk past them? Or say hi? Or wave to them when I think they’re waving at me but they’re waving at their friend behind me?
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Tom writes:
What are your thoughts on reddit? I’m not going to lie, I despise reddit but check it daily just to see what levels of rage inducing ridiculousness it has reduced to, kind of like T-Nation actually, except T-Nation isn’t full of asshole atheists who are ignored and talked over in real life but become real tommy tough guys on an internet message board or facebook.
The majority of it is a bunch of virgins who squat 115lbs for a failed 3×5 workout after 7 months of doing Starting Strength. I guess I’m talking about /r/fitness. I read /r/fitness a lot waiting for someone to say something remotely negative about fat people so a bunch of obese apologists and BBW fetishists come to their rescue. /r/weightroom’s a little better, but it’s the internet so no matter where you go there’s going to be a 50:1 ratio of clueless dipshit fuckheads to people that you’d actually want to hang out with. Also, everyone sucks Rip’s dick over there, and anyone who doesn’t do Starting Strength is downvoted and ridiculed. Unless they’re doing 5/3/1. Cya.
But yeah, reddit in general is a bunch of jobless whiny fucks who don’t lift.
I actually made one friend off of reddit, I met up with him last month at his gym in Dallas. I intend to hang out with him again, I had mentioned him, Josh, and me all scoping out a 24 Hour Fitness in Ft. Worth and trying out a Korean grill that uses wood charcoal.
He is the first new friend I have made in like, a year.
Beonick writes:
Bert, do you have to be matching with your gf too? Is that some kind of Chinese thing?
http://d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net/photo/5579479_460s.jpg
I bought two tank tops and two pairs of short shorts from Gay Mart in Wilton Manors earlier this year. What ended up happening when me and my girlfriend spent time together is she would wear one of the shorts and one of the tanktops and I’d wear the other. My girlfriend and I are also about the same size so we also share most of our clothing.
chrise2004 writes:
I saw this on reddit. hilarious.
but serious question – someone on the reddit comments to that pic said the Orient was like a huge theme park? can you confirm or deny this. and yes the preferred nomenclature is Orient.
but for realz – what type of office do you work at?
Seoul, Korea’s a shithole. It’s slowly getting better. Smells like sewage, everyone’s a fucking asshole. Dunno if I’ve told this story but I’ll tell it again if so, I went there when I was a prepubescent kid and got a haircut. Lady thought I was a fucking girl and gave me a girl’s haircut. It was short, but it was in I guess a feminine style? I couldn’t tell the difference, but other Koreans could. So me and my younger cousin are walking back to the apartment and we’re waiting at a stoplight. These two fucking cops come up to and say,
“Hey. Hey. Yeah you. Are you a girl or a boy?”
I tried to answer, “I’m a boy,” but then they made fun of my accent and the fact that I wasn’t fluent in Korean. Then my younger cousin, who is a girl, mouths off to these two cops asking them why they’re making fun of me for no reason. They just laughed and we went to the apartment and then watched a tv show I didn’t understand.
If I met those dickhead cops again I’d ask them what they benched and proceed to bench a lot more than them. Then I’d say part of their weakness could be attributed to their stupid Korean diet and that kimchi is put on too high of a fucking pedestal in the barely-first-world shithole they call home. BRB still shitting in literal holes in the ground in the 21st century. Fuck em.
One of my aunts moved here like, two decades ago I guess, but she hasn’t assimilated into the culture well, meaning she still retains a lot of the Korean ways of thinking. She tells me that I shouldn’t marry a girl with a college education because smart girls aren’t worth the trouble (let me just clarify that I like this aunt a lot regardless, because she will often point out people in public and ask, ‘What do you think’s wrong with this weirdo?’ and I’m a big fan of that). Most Koreans over the age of 30 would probably agree with this, women have always been treated like shit over there and it’s only just now recently beginning to change a little (maybe?). Alcoholism is rampant over there. Also, any country where the media reports “fan death” as a legitimate cause of death is not worth anyone’s time.
You’re asking me if it was like a huge theme park? Maybe more like a fucking circus freak show, except the entertainers are a bunch of elitist pricks who hate their jobs and think having 90% of the women born in urban areas get a cosmetic eyelid procedure is a necessity. My parents ask me if I want to go back with them sometime, and I always say it wouldn’t be worth missing workouts. I’m not joking when I say it.
The food was good and my extended family is pretty cool.
“What ended up happening when me and my girlfriend spent time together is she would wear one of the shorts and one of the tanktops and I’d wear the other.”
So you literally fucked yourself
My first time “doing” SS (I hesitate to say that because I was 17 and had no fucking idea what I was doing) I “failed” at a 115 3×5 squat. Also I’m doing 5/3/1 now. M’kay.
Brent, of course you can! Let me know where to email you.
nvm I can message you through fb
I will buy…EVERY…shirt…
[creepy?]
People seriously believe that fan death shit? I feel a lot better about myself, now.
The haircut story made me lol. I tried Googling “Korean haircut” and your right….most were scarily similar for guy/gals.
Thanks for the response. I wish we didn’t live states away and I’d meet up with you and not make your legs into a pair of personal walking stilts. We could eat bbq and beat up kids.
The ultimate irony: Brent Kim finally gets his wish and unexpectedly transfers out of his chickenshit outfit one night in his sleep. The cause? Fan death.
Lurking here forever. Told someone they need to to work on their mopeility and he said he always reads mobilitywod. Felt like Leon on Curb Your Enthusiasm telling Jeff he has a Mopey dick and him hearing it as Moby Dick. http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Imh2pjS6-kY
Hi Brentster, I just watched a film called “Safety Not Guaranteed” its kind of a love story between to social misfits. Anyway the girl in it is having an awkward conversation with her father about her social life and he begins saying that he knows she is still a virgin at 19, to this she replies “oh my god how do i eject”, you know like pull the lever and bail the fuck out of this horrible situation. It sounded to me like something you might like to say along with the chickenshit outfit thing. Check the film out you might enjoy it(ending was pretty shitty though).
Speaking of reddit….. Lol just think about what a Mopeilitywod.com meet up would look like.
lol dis u before your cut?
http://www.tvgasm.com/wp-content/uploads/4GlnsKG7cQSCqZGqEwJbIGu8gamesfree_ca_fat_couple.jpeg
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Fuck.
It’s going to be really awkward when I buy one of those “the donkey has no friends” shirts and then see you walking around Plano somewhere (not that I really go anywhere but Market Street and Gold’s).
Is there going to be a silver lining on the back of the t-shirt?
Strong lack of eye contact yesterday and you looked like you were moping hard between sets.
Tell me about a recent incident in which your jimmies were rustled.
Hey Brent
I have a hard time beleiving you are actually depressed
Want to hang out, go hitch hiking, bang broads and high five?
I gave it a shot at raw nationals but you seemed wrapped up in your 70sbig clique and I was pressed for time