Hey guys Kim Bong Un here.

Hey guys, Kim Bong Un here, I didn’t have time to do ring dips Saturday before work but I got the idea that I could do decline push ups in the fucking backroom in-between whatever the fuck it is I actually do up there. So it felt like a prison because I was having to finish my work out doing a bullshit exercise but it also felt good because I was literally getting paid to get an upper body pump. Sad part is I was hoping someone would comment on my pump, or even that my face was red with exertion or that I was breathing hard. Nobody said anything, because the assumption was that I was taking jerk off breaks in the fucking back room and nobody wanted to have that conversation at that moment.

I have taken to collecting at least a few minutes of hamstring stretching at work, I am considering doing even more extreme things like bringing a lacrosse ball up there and possibly even couch stretching. I can only imagine having to explain exactly what the FUCK I’m doing when someone happens to walk past the back room.

“Kim Bil Sung why are you rubbing your butt onto that ball?”

“It’s myofascial soft tissue release – ”

“This is the corporate sexual harassment video, don’t leave until you’ve finished it.”

My mom asked me – angrily this time – why I “STILL” don’t have a girlfriend. She then offered to find one for me. I threatened her with suicide. She continued to insist, implying both that I’m helpless and that she doesn’t care if I die.

No best friends :(

^ Pretty sweet. Good composition and soundtrack, compelling subject matter.

^ This is my life. A bright, promising beginning wasted with poor editing and a lackluster finish. Also a metaphor for what it’s like when I have sex (the bright and promising beginning is because of the hint of chemistry initially followed shortly (and I do mean shortly (and “shortly” has soooo many meanings here)) with disappointment.

Like many young awkward men, this ape wasn’t good with females. Like many young awkward men who aren’t good with females, he became aggressive toward them. He flipped out and attacked one of the girls. Not badly — just enough that she needed stitches. We tried putting them together a few more times, but the result was always the same. Eventually, our un-fly friend was deemed too antisocial to ever find love, and we shipped him off to a bachelor’s home for abusive gorillas. It’s the furry equivalent of a frat house, except nobody ever gets laid.

Inb4 “yawn Brent’s lazy and gives us a link dump post, the blog is dead, fuck 70s Big, fuck Justin and his perfect dick, and fuck you.”

Look guys I don’t know what you want. Actually, I DO know what you want, I just don’t have it. This is a parallel situation with all of the girls I have ever liked. Big dick? Interesting personality? A good soul? Someone who can emotionally communicate beyond the 8th grade level?

I went to the store today to buy some chicken thighs for a faggot recipe. First I went to the bank in the store. I was wearing Chris’s Dallas Strength and Conditioning shirt. The teller who was a guy younger than me asked “Dallas Strength and Conditioning huh, are you a trainer?”

“No.”

“I know me neither,” he says and pretends to flex.

I bought 4lbs of chicken thighs for $6. The helper at the self-check out asked me if I was grilling for a party. I said yes.

I marinated the chicken in coconut oil, balsamic vinegar, brown sugar, salt, pepper, mustard, and minced garlic. It came out pretty good. I ate it with basmati rice. I am bringing the rest to work tomorrow. Someone is going to tell me, “I didn’t know you cooked! Girls love that!”

People at work think I am uber professional and quiet. A few of them have started adding me on facebook. This is my profile pic right now: https://scontent-a-dfw.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/t1.0-9/76_504108366210_6850_n.jpg

My preworkout was a strawberry tres leches parfait and coffee.

I haven’t been doing heavy pulling exercises like deadlifts, weighted pull ups, rows, snatch or clean pulls, etc. so my grip has gotten weaker. The bar rolls in my hands when I snatch and it is actually a limiting factor currently. I tore 4 calluses today snatching, then 2 more when I started doing some snatch pulls to build my grip. People made fun of me because of all the tape on my hands. In their defense – I did look like a fucking idiot. It wasn’t because of the tape on my hands though.

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My new stack.

Target carries VitaFusion gummy vitamins. Of all the supplements that DON’T make a difference, multivitamins for me have made the BIGGEST amount of non-difference, other than turning my pee bright yellow when I took ON’s OptiMan multi. This didn’t stop me from buying them and eating double the recommended daily dosage (no I kid). I liked them so much that I decided to take a page out of Poliquin’s book and super-dosing Vitamin D. Disclaimer: could not care less for most of Poliquin’s recommendations.

Inb4 I develop bone abnormalities from hypervitaminosis A.

So my current stack is basically an excuse to eat candy, which, real talk, legit tastes better than actual candy gummies.

I also have finally got around to getting a hand burr grinder and a Hario V60 to make pourover coffee. The method, though, matters less than the beans, and if I were serious about “good” coffee I’d go to a local roaster and get some light or medium roast African beans. What am I using instead? Currently Starbucks Komodo Dragon blend, the fakest whole bean coffee with supposedly Indonesian origins that more or less tastes like dirt.

Some other dietary modifications: I quit Chipotle, Qdoba’s burrito bowl is superior. I just prefer the ground beef+chicken double meat combo with tomatillo sauce also it’s cheaper.

Found a Korean restaurant 15mins from my apartment that’s open til 2am, Dal Dong Nae. BRB late night galbitang binges.